neededreminding:

LACE & LEATHER .

She hated the way the baroque bodice cut into her skin as though she were being peeled from her rind. She hated the stupid little detailing lancing around her heaving waist, the sheerness that floated around her closed thighs. She even hated the way her reflection appeared as a stranger to her, dolled and dazzled in smoked palettes she’d never come to wear with conviction.

But what she hated most was how wretchedly, ridiculously insecure she felt standing there without a stitch of armor to hide her. No boots, no sweaters, no gilded sheriff pin in sight. Just an awkward, high laced looking princess staring back at her, a useless feast for the eyes of others.

She couldn’t locate where her iron heart had gone. Lost in the mess of a girlish shell she didn’t desire to fit into. But it was for them. As everything had been for months, every decision made to lighten their bartering eyes. Down to the very fine tailor of her clothing, pushing her into the boundaries she’d been terrified to cross into.

Emma had known with changing location to her parent’s royal estate, this would become of her. Clean slate steadily being traced in threads of what had been stolen, the bouncing babe that should have hailed her mother’s crown twenty something years ago. She hadn’t wanted this, hadn’t wanted to sacrifice the core of who Emma Swan was for a past that would never return the way they wished.

“Oh Emma…you look wonderful. Even if it is black, reminds me a little of the things Regina used to wear before everything had happened,” The softness beat through her rigidity, her mother’s hands coming across her bare flecked shoulders. And the look she pierced into the glass was that of a woman who had been waiting for this, to cradle her legacy. “Your first ball…I really didn’t think you’d do this.” No, she’d rather massage Regina’s feet and eat a dozen cursed apples then to parade around in this damn corset trap.

But it was for them. Always for her family. She only gnashed her teeth in a feigned smile to hope that a little bit of Emma could come along with the lace.

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